Excuse me?
by Gently-BlueLeaves4080
Summary: The deadly Italy virus strikes again and this time it type Romano. Join the the countries as they deal with their foul mouth and stuff. Contains lots of swearing and crude Romano jokes. CRACK-ish.


All the nations were gathered in one particular meeting in Naples, Italy for a world meeting. It was there lunch break and they allwent out to eat, taking in the sights and peolpe as they went. That was a horrible mistake on their part as that was one of the biggst ways to catch the R1SI. Also better known as the Italy Romano virus.

Germany, as usual, arrived back at the meeting area first and on time. He was dragging in with Italy, full of pasta and was followed by Japan, holding a camera and snapping pictures now and then at a rate even Hungary was jealous of. None of them noticed anything amiss in each others behaviors so they each promplty took their seats, taking about vairious things (though one particularly taking about pasta).

Next to arrive were both Russia and China, one more nevous than the other. Shortly after that South Korea and the rest of the Asians arrived after that with the previously mentioned nation talking about how everything was made in his country da ze~. England, dragging in a whinning American complaing about the lack the lack of Mc Donalds and small sizes, and a drooling Frenchman covered in scrapes of papers with numbers writen on them but more so slap marks. It was obvious he was thoroughly infataued with the locals despite the gender. Every so often England snapped at them, only to have America laugh obnoxiosly back. Because of said nations laughter, no one noticed the Brit's change of insults. Rather than '_Bloody git'_ he now adopted the the word _'Bastard'_ with a slight accent change.

Time passed and more and more nations fillled the room. Despite the beutiful weather out, everyone seemed to be more put out than earlier and was constantly bickering. The only one who seemed to be unaffected was Italy Veneciano -and Spain for that matter.

"Ve~ why is-a eveyone-a fighting?" he wondered aloud. "They all sound-a like-a fratello!" Someone, upon hearing this replyed, "Shut up you stupid pasta bastard, no one cares about your stupid fratello!" This caused Italy to to start crying and apologising saying that he had reatives in anonymous's country and to please have mercy on him. Another nation joiened saying, "Leave him alone you nosy bastard. No one fucking cares about your opinian."

"Oh yeah? And what made you so special, you fucking retard!"

"I don't know if you fucking got it or just to fucking dense but your still not invited, nosy bastard!" And the went on and on, fighting about about sensless thing, as did many other nations.

Italy by now, had calmed down and took this opportunity to escape and go find Germany. Along the way a scene which most nations didn't was possible was bieng played, not that Italy really cared but I'll tell you anyway.

America had approached his northern neighbor and youner brother looking quite flustered. Canada, the usually shy, kind, and quiet nation was yelling insults to everyone about how the ignored him. But his voice was still to low to be heard and anyone who did hear dismissed it by saying _'Shut up invisible _or _ghost bastard'_ . Canada sighed, it seemed no matter what he did no one would notice. Mabye if he started self-harming himself? The thought never occured but now it seemed like a good idea. At that America had reached the lonley Canadian.

"H-hey dude," he managed to get out.

"What is it America?" he replyed rather annoyed.

"W-well you see it just that I want you to...To-"

"Spit it already, Hero-bastard!"

"I just wish you wouldn't keep hogging all the attention! Everyone always loves you and has nice things to say about you so there I said it! Damn Pancake-bastard!"

"You think you have attention problems? Know one even knows my fucking name!" Retorted Canada, after all he was infected to.

Anywho, elsewhere Poland had walked up to Germany and began insulting him.

"Hey, Manly-bastard like, I've been wanting to like, tell you that like, that frilly pink apron you were is so not girly, like, your like, to like, manly, you know~!" Germany, who thrived one manlieness was quite pleades that others thought of like that. "Shut up Girly-bastard, you are to girly for a man." And Poland was quite pleased by this remark.

The same scenarios follwed between jelous siblings and very confused insulters. All the while a very _very_ angry Italian was yelling.

"you call that insulting! My turtle could out-sult you any day! Bastards!" Yelled a very angry Romano. But liked I said before there was another individual who unaffected by the virus.

"Romano! Roma~!" A very happy Spainiard called out. He embraced Romano in a tight hug. "Chigi! Get off me you fucking tomato bastard! And don't call me that!" Romano yelled as he struggled to free himself. Spain of course ingnored him. "And who come your not affected!" asked Romano. "Its 'cause I developed an immunity to it after beieng with you for so long~!" Spain answered cooly. Romano cringed at the last part. "Sh-shut up you tomato-bastard."

At that moment everyone turned to Romano, still in Spain's tight embrace. They all reached into their pockets and pulled out a familiar black object. They raised it up and went:

"MOOSTACHE!"

"CH-_CHIGII_!"

Up in hevean Rome started at the out-burst."What was that." he asked his partner. "I don't know... Your grandson?" came the reply from Germania.

~End~

**Thanks for reading this epic fail sorry if it sucked I promise I'll get better! Here yesterday was my brother's birthday so have some cake *hands you non-existent** **with forgivness*.**

**Have a nice colourful day~!**


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